• hmenear94

The Procession of Saint Eldritch Palmier

This is a random encounter knocking around in the tables I wrote up for my home game. Seed it somewhere the dead are restless. At night. Portray it with a mixture of Gilliam's Jabberwocky and a Bela Lugosi flick.


The Procession of Saint Eldritch Palmier

You hear: at first, the distant sounds of jangly, slightly tuneless music, accompanied by a strange rhythmic clattering. The warble of horns. A tremulous zithering. The crunch of a thousand maracas.

You see: as the sound grows louder, torches, flickering with green and blue flames, wind into view into view. The ground is blanketed in viscious fog. The blackness draws in, focusing the eye. From the night emerges a procession of some 3d6 + 20 Skeletons: torchbearers, tumblers, acrobats, a fire eater, flagbearers, hooded acolytes, and a troupe of ghostly musicians (who are the ones making the odd, jangling tune with a clutch poorly-tuned mandolins, cracked zithers, a harp carried upon the backs of four skeletal children, violins, a double bass, drums, a glockenspiel, and a quartet of coiling, dented brass horns).


At the head of the procession: rides Saint Eldritch Palmier (also a Skeleton, but with 5 HD and capable of casting spells as an 8th level Cleric; affects haughtiness, but keeps breaking into fits of mirth and song mid-parable. He wants to know where you've been. He knows where you're going). Saint Eldrtich is dressed in flowing purple and ermine robes, draped with gold and silver relics (gold-bound books of scripture, rings, trinkets and charms, goblets, censers, lockets, diminutive reliquaries worth 1,200 gp) and borne atop a pommel horse (made from the skeleton of a real horse) by half a dozen more skeletal worshippers.


All the skeletons (including Saint Eldritch) are clapping, dancing, and stamping their feet in time to the song. The procession (unless molested) passes by without breaking step. All who listen to the music must save vs Spells or join in, dancing alongside the macabre parade. All who do so may ask one question of Saint Eldritch which the GM must answer truthfully in the form of an ad hoc mummers’ play, cryptic vision, or song performed (badly) by the skeletons. Anyone affected regains consciousness at dawn, 2d6 hexes (or 2d10 miles) away from where they started, as the back of the procession disappears into the morning mist.


The GM chooses one important item belonging to the PC (or d666 gp) that they find is now missing from their supplies.



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